We’re officially in October and Fall is upon us. That means you’re going see Christmas stuff soon. The holidays come earlier and earlier every year, it seems. There’s alot of stress associated with all of it whether you are bursting at the seams with excitement or just wishing it would all go away. For some of us, there’s alot to look forward to, lots of planning parties, togetherness and tradition. For others, holidays just bring back sad memories of people you’ve lost, new grief for old wounds and/or knowing that you’re just going to be alone. People get low and it hurts. You don’t fit the happy holiday mold that others seem to, you’re looked at as the wet blanket at the party and you can’t help it. There’s alot of people who feel like that. It’s called Seasonal Depression.
Seasonal Depression…..Let’s Get Serious
Sometimes your seasonal depression isn’t caused by the loss of someone but instead the sadness caused by not being comfortable in your own skin or not feeling like you can even be yourself. You may feel isolated as a sissy or cross dresser. Maybe your family doesn’t accept you or you’ve never been able to tell them who you really are. There are those of you with estranged families because you chose to live your life, but that last thing you feel is empowered and free. The holidays only remind you of who you’re not seeing, what you’re not doing, what you’re missing. Some of you find yourself in a dark place over the holidays and it feels like you’ll never crawl out, but that’s not true.
I’ve been in that dark place before and I’m living proof that things can get better. But it didn’t happen at the bottom of a bottle, after the last bite of ice cream in the carton or after that one guy left my bed and I never got his name. It happened because I let people in. I wrote down my feelings and talked to someone that could help me see things in a new way. I pushed myself to get out of bed.
Read about some ways you can handle seasonal depression in this throwback blog from 2016.( I highly recommend the light therapy lamp.)
Limbo
It’s October and we’re officially in a limbo stage beween Summer and Holiday. It’s a time to prepare because you know what’s coming. And it’s okay not to be okay. If you know that’s where you are, please don’t retreat altogether. Take your rest time but don’t close the door on life. There are good things to be had and people who want to see you find it. If you need to talk, reach out to someone. If things are worse than that, call the National Suicide Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.
You’re worth it.
For me fall/winter is my favorite season as I can wear women’s turtleneck sweaters/scarves/yoga pants/leggings/bras/panties underneath along with ankle knee high boots. I used to be so worried what others think but now I don’t care. If women can wear this so can I. With my friend accepting that I like to wear women’s clothes she said not to worry about her husband or care what others think anymore. Especially now she’s selling women’s clothes and wants me to buy them from her. Honestly the only relationship I want to have is to have women into this. If not it’s their loss. I think having real mistress is what’s best and needed for me who’s into dressing me up as a girl. Guys I work with don’t notice or care as they are to focused on work. I’ve cut my hours back as I need to start focusing on my health and other interests instead of working all the time.
Exactly, Paulina!
This time of year does suck with the shorter days. It’s been a struggle for me the last few years and though I haven’t thought about how much it triggers me it’s still in the back of my mind.
Sending strength to you and others who need it this season. ❤️
What a sweetheart you are!